The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
