420 ftw
Me. At least after what I've been through.
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
