we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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