fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
So many bounce houses so little time
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
Sorry about my life...
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Randomize
