Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize
