My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
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