yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Fuck appropriateness.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Randomize
