So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
