Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Randomize
