she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
When are your genitals available?
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Randomize
