bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
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