And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
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