YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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