Who did Billy Mays play for?
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
Randomize
