that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
