I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
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