i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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