I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
I could fuck to npr.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Randomize
