Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Randomize
