I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
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