Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
