I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Randomize
