If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
