I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
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