Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
false alarm, still single
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
