i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Randomize
