Don't look now but I am in class with a mixed drink
Don't look now but my prof just asked me if I was drinking a screwdriver
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Randomize
