And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Randomize
