he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
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