My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
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