He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize