yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
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