Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
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