I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I just had sex on a roof
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
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