I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Randomize