Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
