Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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