Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Randomize
