I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
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