Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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