Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
Randomize
