benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
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