watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
Randomize