haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Randomize
