Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
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