I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize
