At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
Randomize
