so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
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