My nipple is on Facebook.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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