Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
I deserve to be covered in dicks
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Randomize
