How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Randomize
